Final Placement is a Christian Rock band from Midland Tx. It consists of four guys from Midland Christian School. They are currently playing shows. They dream of scoring a record label one day. The philosophy of FP is, “The world is gone but not lost it can still be saved, all it takes is the people to listen. Maybe if they will hear the message and change.”

(Ack !, Thanks again Cory !)

Update: The lead guitarist is graciously taking questions in the comments section

If he was doing that to help his friends and actually wanted to help them, he wouldn’t be paying them out on this thread.

Personally, I would call troll on STRS.

D C
Dude let me try to break down this concept for you, ‘cause your not getting it. Take out the idea that STRS can strum a guitar, alot of folks can do that.His playing is not my point!! STRS was a nobody, he played with this band, looked like he was part of it to me, and in a matter of a few days they are a internet something and this guy bails on them. His video was on the internet for a year with 500 hits, I saw this video on youTube before it was pulled it had 35000 hits. Looks like the band made him something that he couldn’t do on his own, and then he trash talks them. My hope is when they make it to Kimmel it’ll be with a diffrent Guitar player. This one has NO character!! Get it NOW!!??

No I was born in 1994 you jerk. Dont even try to school me about green Day, they have been my favorite band for years, ever since I heard Bolevard of Broken dreams.

but my second favorite band is still the tattle tales :p

i havent laughed this hard in a long time. not only at the video, but the comments. thank you

I’m not buying that STRS is really who he says he is or that the guitarist in the youtube talent clip is also the guitarist in the Final Placement video.

I’m not buying that STRS is really who he claims to be.  Also, the guitarist from the youtube talent show clip and the guitarist from the Final Placement video are not the same dudes.

I’m with doyal - this has been both hilarious and educational.

whoever you guys got to do that recording needs to get back to his day-job!

And Simon Peter followed Jesus ... and went in with Jesus into the palace of the high priest. ... Then saith the damsel that kept the door unto Peter, Art not thou also one of this man’s disciples? He saith, I am not…. And Simon Peter stood and warmed himself. They said therefore unto him, Art not thou also one of his disciples? He denied it, and said, I am not. One of the servants of the high priest, being his kinsman whose ear Peter cut off, saith, Did not I see thee in the garden with him? Peter then denied again: and immediately the cock crew. John 18:15-17, 25-27

Starts with a nice enough Television sound…

I would like to take this time to wholeheartedly thank lead guitarist for contributing to this brilliant nightmare. The solo at 2:10 is some stright up scary shit. The descending lift scenes are too good. Thanks again and if you can make more, please do.

@Setting the record straight,

Your solo is not too bad, but what is your excuse for the jeans you are wearing?  They are worse than the song.

I agree, this needs to be exploited and embraced by all members. REUNION TOUR!

Proof that there is Heaven and Hell, ‘cause I’m in Hell right now watching this.

Final Placement is in my prayers!! Great things come to those who wait upon the LORD!! The youngmen in this Band in this group have Sonship to the Most High Kingdom and will be heirs to God’s Promises!!

My Testimony :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKJ2w9wpGDU&feature=youtube_gdata

I have a question for the lead guitarist: when do you plan on learning to play your instrument?

Rock on, STRS. I liked that video you posted of your real fake band - very fun song choices. Doesn’t seem like you’re afraid of failure, you’re just afraid of not having a good time, which is what that Final Placement video turned out to be.

Well, I personally haven’t enjoyed a video that much in years!

Thanks for that! Sheer epic awesomeness!

OWN that shit, baby!

Bill Pardy-

You are missing this point of all the criticism here.  The criticism has nothing to do with the band’s status in the “Most High Kingdom”.  It has everything to do with the quality (or lack thereof) of their music.  Sonship does not equal good music.  Apple and oranges, buddy.

Vote for final placement at rockthecamp.endavomedia.com
until then enjoy these lyrics

there are times when we all fall down
can’t seem to get it off the ground
you put your hope on what you do
but still feel you never get through

you know it’s hard
most of the time
but one fine day
you will find

this is your life
this is your time
it’ll be alright
you’re gonna shine
a second chance
a brand new day
don’t give up
you’ll find a way

so take a deep breath
and close your eyes
this is your life
you’re gonna shine
cause this is your life

you think the world has got you and
you can’t seem to like happy end and
it’s a one step forward two steps back
the train is running off the tracks

you know it’s hard
most of the time
but one fine day
you will find

this is your life
this is your time
it’ll be alright
you’re gonna shine
a second chance
a brand new day
don’t give up
you’ll find a way

so take a deep breath
and close your eyes
this is your life
you’re gonna shine
cause this is your life

(solo)

take it all in stride
one step at a time
cause someday you will find
the words you’re looking for

take it all in stride
one step at a time
cause someday you will find
the words you’re looking for

this is your life
this is your time
it’ll be alright
you’re gonna shine
a second chance
a brand new day
don’t give up
you’ll find a way

so take a deep breath
and close your eyes
this is your life
you’re gonna shine
cause this is your life [my emphasis]

They are young! Your critiscism doesn’t mean much in the most High Kingdom.

Ps refer to Jon Stamos comment made in this thread.

Get ready for this to BLOW UP.  I think DM is gonna have some major traffic soon.  My lil bro has a ‘christian rock’ band very similar to this.  He should make a vid…lol…

@Jeff

Yup, I think it’s safe to say that this FP phenomenon is only starting to build.

The (potential) story arc—obscurity, Internet fame, Jimmy Kimmel, merchandising—has a corresponding emotional graph for these earnest young men of obscurity, red-faced embarrassment, lots of distancing themselves, mentally, from the song/video/band, plotting to off Brad Laner… then they get some real *attention* (even the bad sort of fame will get you laid) and decide to embrace it—which I hope they do—and ride it for a short time.

When Xeni posted this on Boing Boing, it just took off like wildfire. She’s at an extremely high leverage point culturally (look how many TV shows crib Boing Boing for ideas) so who knows where this goes from here? The entire saga is hilarious/wonderful/priceless.

Trust me Final Placementers, you want to stay on this train for as long as you can. You might end up being in a soda commercial or something and make some good $ for college. Embrace your inner Tay Zonday, dudes.

If they give, you should grab.

Television. I have to admit I thought that too!

Richard

First of all…these dudes totally need to run with this WIN.

Second…STRS’s talent show video was pretty great. He definitely has chops.

That said, check out my buddy Shane’s initial reaction to the epic Final Placement music video!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9U-bLSeUAVg

Just hold out for the Tosh.0 Web Redemption where you’ll get to re-record it in a professional setting with a producer.

Hang on, this isn’t meant to be a joke? I thought you were playing out of time on purpose. What about the bit where the guy is walking around aimlessly on the street, that’s meant to be serious? P.s. I do actually like the song. Oh and why did you remove the video from youtube? you could have been famous.

Actually, God is far more interested in asking you to kill your children for talking back (8 instructions in the old testament, 2 in the new testament) than in vague instructions not to engage in same-gender sex (1 old testament instruction, 1 very vague new testament instruction).

So, in closing: you can’t be a bible literalist without killing your children for backtalking, or killing a neighbor for wearing clothes made from 2 different natural fibers.

Excellent point-by-point proving you’re a douche.

And no, no one believes you play with anyone but yourself.

Piece

These guys have mastered the Can Can AND the Christian sidehug - Aaaawwwwesome! I can’t get that solo out of my head… no really, can’t get it out - please help.

It is a little questionable whether anyone in the band told him to play that solo like that or not.

It’s not a terrible solo, it’s just played in the wrong fucking key.  Did anyone in the band tell him to play the solo in the wrong key?  If so, that’s amazing.  If not, he just really couldn’t hear what was going on.  Either one is amazing.  None of us would be discussing it at length if it were in the key of the song, so joke’s on us… and maybe STRS.

That was metal as fuck.

My guess is because the bass player and guitarist/singer supposedly tracked first and STRS and drummer had to play to THEM, the first two guys probably didn’t tune up properly (like, a little above or below 440) so the STRS had to wank, probably in a rush, and couldn’t tune to the guys or find the right key, so everything sounds off. That’s just my guess.

Shit’s still awesome! (in bad way…but that can be good).

I’d pay to see this shit live…and cheer it in a perverse way. With the advent of Pro-Tools and gridding, everything sounds so stiff and non human. Whereas this sounds ALL TOO HUMAN!

Perhaps “Final Placement” knew exactly what they were doing.  In a mere music video, they were able to capture the ever-present, yet unfounded, optimism of youth.  And that true DIY spirit, that everyone claims to have.  The essence of the ironically soulless Christian rock genre.  And the idea that mediocrity (or in this case pure shit) is all right, because at least you tried.  And the pureness of that first take, with little or no practice, and even less talent.  Finally, those gut-wrenching empathic feelings you have for your fellow man, especially when they make an ass of themselves to the entire world.

  This is pure genius. This is far beyond the capabilities of a bunch of kids.  If John Hughes had shot a video about a horrible teenage Christian band from the Midwest, it would look just like this, it would sound like this.  And if he did, well, then he would shoot himself.  And this video is proof of my theory that John Hughes killed himself after directing this video.  And disproves the whole heart-attack cover-up.  The timing is just too close (but hopefully far enough not to be too offensive to his friends and family).

  I think the real offense here, is not (just) the video, but the fact that John Hughes is not posthumously credited for such genius.  I dare, no, I challenge “Final Placement” to come up with another video as brilliant as this one. (and without John Hughes! RIP)

At least it’s better than f’ing 3 Doors Down. Final Placement should get 3 Door Down to open up for them at the reunion show…and snub them on using the whole PA.

Juan Jughes,

I acknowledge your premise and believe it be fairly valid.

But more importantly I think you are right about this being the epitome of DIY. There’s no filter here. No self conscious attempts at being artsy or original; however, by failing so epically as has been stated, FP inadvertently fell upon some mysterious truth greater than all of us. It’s like performance art, without the forethought.

Hey final place we’d love to tour with you guys someday hit us up…

http://myspace.com/Bloodworm

This music produces the same visceral effect as The S From Hell:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6j8EhsJrIA&feature=related

I’ve listened to this at least 20 times so you’ve got a convert here.

Is there other Final Placement material out there?

This would be a neat cover for the White Lies to do on BBC’s Live Lounge.

I guess I’m the only one who is looking forward to putting on my iPod. This is gonna my song of the summer.

I am HONESTLY listening to it again right now.

I love the fully loaded pick holders.

Singer:  Jacob Golden
Bass:  Jarret Golden

Hey STRS, have you ever met coach Taylor? How is he in person?

THE TATTLE FUCKING TALES

NEW EP OUT SOON

Hey JohnStamos - actually Jonathan’s point-by-point response to your totally baseless claim that he probably doesn’t really play guitar removed any doubt (that didn’t exist anyway) that he is a musician.  It also made clear that he thinks STRS knows how to play but has a long long way to go; and STRS’ weak effort to disclaim the notes that he willingly committed to the recording does not justify the atrocious guitar solo (not to mention his participation in the can-can dance).

He told STRS he has potential - that’s a nice thing to say.  And then he called him out for slamming the project that he voluntarily contributed to.  That’s an honest (and completely valid) thing to say.  The truth isn’t always pretty.

Peace.  Not “Piece”, JohnStamos (unless maybe you are threatening to shoot someone who ruffles your feathers).  Peace.

I refuse to believe you were innocently taken advantage of because i clearly see you participating with a shiny face in the now infamous “rocker rockette” chorus line!

Setting The Record Straight: Watched your talent show video, and HELL yes. That was terrific, seriously. Some amazingly fun and nicely done playing. Way to REALLY set the record straight! Sorry everyone in the comment section keeps referring to you as the “Final Placement Guy”. I hope you end up shaking that moniker sooner rather than later…

Everyone else, quit saying he sold out “his band mates”. They aren’t his “band mates”. He was a hired gun. And he is telling the truth for cryin’ out loud.

WOW Ennie,
I bet being STRS’ mom has been tough this past couple of days. So glad to see you could make it out onto this thread…I’m sure you’ve been pretty busy wiping his nose and stroking his ego.

I thought, however, that I would include a definition of “sell-out” since perhaps you are a bit confused, ma’am.
SELL OUT: Slang, To betray one’s cause or colleagues

Even according to STRS, nobody pressured him into it…he participated in his own accord. So the fact that now that mostly HIS SOLO has been the laughing stock of the internet, he feels the need to “clear the air” (read:sell out his friends)

There is no doubt he can play a guitar…but being a musician (heck, even a member of the human race) you have to take the good with the bad. There is only room for improvement from here.

As far as him “shaking the ‘Final Placement Guy’ moniker soon. I sure hope he does. I wouldn’t want to be affiliated with a d-bag like him.

I agree with FPFan…
STRS sure did look like he was “feelin’” the music when he was playing it…also, can-can chorus line.
Dude, own up to it. Actually, do us all a favor and just go away. I’d like to see what these guys are capable of in the future and I hope they have a different lead guitarist.
iTunes anyone?
NEED THIS ON MY iPOD STAT!

This song has been stuck in my head since yesterday. I just ff through the solo.

Where oh where is STRS? He has been noticeably absent from here for a day or so.

These guys are the G.G. Allin of Christian rock.  And they bring the poo!

Those nutty harmonies “This is your (((LIIIFFFEEE))). It’s like art core. They stumbled onto some new shit - playing and singing out of tune is the new Punk Rock. Soon bands will form where playing out of tune and off key will be the standard. If you are in tune and on tempo - you will be considered square, stiff, and too uptight. Get loose with it. “Untune” will be the trend. Bands will cover “Shine”...note for bad note, sloppy chorus cues included. If you play the song too good (intune), it’s not considered a valid version of the song - You Fail. Dudes will dissect STRS’s note choices and study his “out technique.” STRS = the generation’s Greg Ginn or Pharaoh Sanders.

It’s like bad jazz-pop. You gotta do it wrong to make it right. If you don’t step on each chorus a half-beat too soon and sell that thing, you’re “NOT in the Out Pocket enough.”

Wow, Brad Laner, you sure were happy to expound on the shittiness of this band until the guitarist showed up. Maybe instead of telling him to “own” his bad solo, you should “own” your own assholic posts and quit backtracking with half-compliments like “no hipster could make music this real.” Also, way to keep culture safe by insulting a bunch of freaking HIGH SCHOOL KIDS FROM TEXAS. What were you doing in high school, writing Mahler symphonies? You are a classless tool.

Jokerman is not joking.

I think they stumbled on to something here.  Pop musicians literally sound like robots (pitch correction).  It’s totally DIY.  What is even better is they are Christians, so I assume there weren’t drugs and alcohol involved.  So it’s straight edge too.

This could be the birth of something new!

I think I’ve been pretty consistent,before and after Collin showed up, Francine. I like it because it’s so sincere and so bad. Get it ? They put the video up for all the world to enjoy and that’s what I did. Even the guitarist had no problem with my criticism. What’s your problem ?
In high school I was doing noisy art punk, putting out records on the Minutemen’s label, taking a lot of acid , getting laid a lot and opening for Nico and other interesting people. Thanks for asking.

and this is something I did in 7th grade

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfAIbAWMkSg

put this thing back up on youtube and let it ride all the way to tosh.0 web redemption!  why not?!  its not like people havent already seen it/called it crap.  its fine!  i would!

Hey guitarist guy. Much to my shame, I was once in a band as bad as yours. The guitarist displayed a flair for fingerwork, much like you do, and went on to do amazing things. Don’t give up. But all of you should know that you’re not Mozart grade musicians, and the market is pretty darn saturated, and you should seek a different career path than music. Just keep it on the sidelines for fun. Do good work that helps people. Unfortunately in my opinion, no music, however good or bad, qualifies as this.

Please stop. What your doing make Jesus weep. In fact, he’s sobbing uncontrollably because I just listened to it for 30 seconds.

Jan Terri’s long lost sons!

The guitar solo at 2:08 was pretty baller.

Seriously, STRS, reconcile with your bandmates, restore the band’s Facebook and MySpace accounts, and ride this wave of viral fame all the way to the Jimmy Kimmel show. Get as much out of this ride as you can, because it will be short. But that’s no reason not to do it. Hundreds of thousands of people are listening to your music, no matter the reason. Most high school bands can only dream of the attention you’re getting. Embrace it.

I absolutely love the song.

Man, It would be sooooo rad if that had an album’s worth of songs in this vein - out of tune, off tempo, with out of key solos…but in a pop rock context. What would you call this genre…other than the obvious insulting stuff that first comes to mind?

Out Rock?
Un-rock?
Curse pop?
Wobbly Rock? (Wob Rock)
Earnest Core?

Setting the Record Straight:

I saw the Talent Show video. The singer was horrid but you are an amazing guitarist. Don’t sweat being associated with Final Placement. I think it’s a badge of honor, and you’ve obviously got the talent to redeem yourself.

STRS:
Can you get me in touch with the singer? I produce/record music and I’d like to try to help make this right so that everybody saves face and comes out dignified. I’m volunteering myself to help, for free, and I’m not joking. I’d at least like the opportunity to explain to the singer what I suggest he do now. Perhaps the Dangerous Minds moderator can put us in touch?
Thanks.

The eruption solo is amazing!!! totally redeemed

Wow. Things got a little vicious in my absence. It’s cool. I said some stupid things. I deserve it. I was in the video. I deserve whatever you want to throw at me. Just dropping back in to say I have embraced this thing. I don’t like, it, but I did it. So I’ll accept whatever comes with it. The Internet always wins. Especially when things like this come along.

welcome back ! So are you guys swimming in crazy offers now ?

Oh my god in heaven. Anyone who thinks this song is any good at all is an idiot. the recording just isn’t ‘off’, there’s not a single beat that’s in time. The guitars sound like they were plugged directly into a 386. Actually, that might have made them sound better. And the guitarist. You are a douche man. A DOUCHE. You suck. being able to fret a string and get a sound does not make you a decent musician. You’re terrible, as bad as the drummer, singer and bass player. Not even the ‘film maker’ could get anything to be in synch. At least the drummer had the good sense not to appear in the video.

STRS! Yeh, good move. It’ll all be forgotten in year. Just have fun with it, dude. It’ll be the raddest story when you get to college, I promise.

And STRS, you can play…you’re in there kind of bluesily riffing down on that solo…tit’s just the shit’s not in tune with the other two dudes. Or they’re not in tune with you. I bet $100 they didn’t tune with a tuner before they tracked that thing. And I’m guessing you were in some kind of rush and just laid your tracks down real quickly.

Roll with it. Make up with the brothers and see if ya’ll can get it rolling. Above all, don’t practice! And don’t tune! Trust me, ya’ll are on to something nutty.

This is exactly what kids should be doing in high school! I hope these guys don’t take any of this stuff too seriously.

I think I may have to set up a support group.
Does anyone else have the epic fail guitar solo looping in their head some days?

I did when I woke abruptly at 5am today.

FOR TWO HOURS.

Now it’s come back, only the whole song is playing.

:(

STRS:
I’d like to point out that it seems like what a lot of people are reacting to in the Final Placement song are tuning issues. Second to that I’d say are issues of guitar and bass tone. If this song was re-recorded, in tune, with a little grit-and-polishing in the right places (and maybe a chord or two less in the bridge) AND with a stronger vocal take (which would be easier to get with the instruments in time and in tune) I’d bet my time, resources, and a plane ticket to Texas that it’d be as good as or better than a lot of the indie rock I see/hear my friends listening to and buying all the time. I think as a good musician which you obviously are, you saw some potential in this when you first did it. I’m just saying, you guys could truly seize this moment and turn it into dignified careers by using it to showcase your actual potential.
Just a thought.

See my point? If it really was an ‘epic fail’, why is it looping in his head?